I cannot seem to catch my breath
winds blowing hard against my every leaf.
There is not place outside to find a niche.
What should I feel when pummeled toward my death.

Five months ago I rose and saw a great adventure
before my eyes. An energy I love awoken
A goal to reach, a new rider to strut his stuff;
A dear friend, with really such a lively brain.

No easy task I undertook for age and confused temperament :
best just to say both are old and certainly I have a bent.
Some tinged with barbs as hard as barbs can be
but not with malice but with love laid where not all see

Not all saw that and so I grieve far more than most
My health has disappeared and cancers found me tasty
The rider now like me is fighting but far more risky.
The adventure taken back for others to be host.

And that is only part of all that tilts my bowler.
I struggle now to find the path to bring back health.
Years now I know good healing with herbs and homeopathy
That stand out in my mind gainst Chemo and XRay killer.

I listen to the folks I trust and place down all the questions
and sit with doctors who have figures to their benefit.
So I’ve changed my food and take supplements too
And mix up things that look like goo.

My last big chore is to give up the weed.
Addiction is a potent greedy freak
I’m coming close to the devil now
And soon I'll regain my strong know how.

And I sit alone in my dark third floor
With my solitaire and my mind out the door’
I can’t seem to find my feet on the floor
Just a mind caught nowhere and nowhere to go.

It’s the lot of my life to live in between
A mind in the wind with the leaves all akilter
But I try my best to stand up in the storm
I’m not much for quitting. I can take lots more.